I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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