it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
