we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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