Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
