How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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