I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
