He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
