did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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