in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
