i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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