Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
