I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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