I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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