What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
MIDGETS
????
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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