You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
