that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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