i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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