i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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