And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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