Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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