My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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