You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
last night I used snow as a chaser
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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