I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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