No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
