Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
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