I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
