ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize