Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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