so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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