Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out mid-signature
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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