....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
They should really pass out barf bags in church
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
