we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
