Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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