How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
