At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize