Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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