I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
