we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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