hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
