Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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