he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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