Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
should my penis look like a turkey
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize