i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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