Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
