I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
