Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize