what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
