some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize