Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.