does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
