So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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